Honoring Our Ancestors

People living deeply have no fear of death. —ANAIS NIN

For many, October 31 marks the revelry of honoring our ancestors.

Samhain.

All Saints.

All Souls.

Since 1953, people in Sweden observe All Saints' Day on the Saturday between October 31 and November 6. The cemeteries are all aglow with candles and lanterns to honor the dead.

For a few years, I've placed candles on my ancestral altar to celebrate their lives and how they protect and guide my family. I've received side-eye from people when I speak of my altar; many deem that word evil when actually it is used in many religions, even Christianity. There is nothing nefarious about honoring those who have passed, and though I celebrate them every single day, I do love the public festivities (our community holds a special ceremony).

This year, I added a candle beneath the lilac tree we planted for Dad. When they placed it in July, I sprinkled a handful of his ashes with the roots. I had a lovely plaque made, and it's a spot where we bring flowers and momentoes or find comfort on bumpy days.

It's eternally Dad's tree.

Since I was young, I always looked to my ancestors for guidance. When I was a teenager, at night, I would open my window, even in the middle of winter, and pray to God, Great Grandma Trigg, and the moon; I had to cover all my bases. Even if it were something as trivial as passing a Geography test, I'd put it out in the atmosphere.

I'd burn incense.

Put on some Mazzy Star.

My horoscope was pinned to the board on my wall.

My poetry taped to my closet doors.

I had a small wooden side table in my bedroom filled with photos of those living and those who passed, both family and friends, dried flowers, personal gems, coins, rocks, and candles. Even then, I had an altar I cherished.

My Grandma had something similar; Dad had an ancestral altar in the basement peppered with antique cameras and old photographs. They had a place to gather, a place to remind them of our ancestors and the beautiful treasures they passed down to us along the way—stories attached to each one.

Memories.

I'm grateful for each family heirloom I've received and honored they've entrusted me to keep them safe and to celebrate their importance and truths.

It's easy to get tangled up in what something should look like or what we should believe in; really, it's about what makes me feel connected to my ancestors. I've allowed people throughout the years to shame me or tell me my soul needs saving because I'm not the proper Christian.

It's nonsense.

I've had incredible spiritual experiences since I was little, truly beginning when my Great Grandma Trigg passed away in 1988, and no one can take those wonderful moments away from me.

Many revere the dead.

Dia de Los Muertos: Day of the Dead, the holiday originated in Mexico; it is celebrated all over Latin America with colorful calaveras (skulls) and calacas (skeletons).

Samhain, on this day, the Celts believed the veil between the living and the dead was thin.

All Souls Day in the Catholic religion, All Saints' Day in Sweden, is a national holiday with religious and traditional significance.

Let us celebrate our ancestors and feel their love and protection. Let us keep their memories alive, tell stories, cook their favorite foods, and sing their favorite songs. Look through photos, share laughter and tears, and through the grief and love, know they are with us.

Always.